Have you seen this letter? It’s rich with words that, I imagine, you will agree and disagree with given our increasingly divisive political discourse around marriage. It is, in part, a completely pastoral letter, written by Catholic bishops for their flock in England and Wales, where pastoral has to do with the recognized church leadership giving sound, biblical, and/or theological guidance to those members in their care, particularly, and in this case, when it comes to the issue of marriage in the UK.
These letters are worn and read into the fabric of Christians, and people familiar with Christianity, no matter whether Catholic, Orthodox, or Protestant. A portion of the Christian Scriptures are essentially pastoral letters which address timely concerns. Of course, the “damaging pages” of our Scriptures make a broader impact since they are canonized within the Bible.
Take a look at the letter. It’s a touch longer than you may be accustomed. I found it originally here.
Do you learn anything from it? Does it widen or shrink your own views about marriage? Does it help you see what this church in the UK is passing on to future generations?
This week the Coalition Government is expected to present its consultation paper on the proposed change in the legal definition of marriage so as to open the institution of marriage to same-sex partnerships.
Today we want to put before you the Catholic vision of marriage and the light it casts on the importance of marriage for our society.
The roots of the institution of marriage lie in our nature. Male and female we have been created, and written into our nature is this pattern of complementarity and fertility. This pattern is, of course, affirmed by many other religious traditions. Christian teaching fills out this pattern and reveals its deepest meaning, but neither the Church nor the State has the power to change this fundamental understanding of marriage itself. Nor is this simply a matter of public opinion.
Understood as a lifelong commitment between a man and a woman, and for the creation and upbringing of children, marriage is an expression of our fundamental humanity. Its status in law is the prudent fruit of experience, for the good of the spouses and the good of the family. In this way society esteems the married couple as the source and guardians of the next generation. As an institution marriage is at the foundation of our society.
There are many reasons why people get married. For most couples, there is an instinctive understanding that the stability of a marriage provides the best context for the flourishing of their relationship and for bringing up their children. Society recognises marriage as an important institution for these same reasons: to enhance stability in society and to respect and support parents in the crucial task of having children and bringing them up as well as possible.
The Church starts from this appreciation that marriage is a natural institution, and indeed the Church recognises civil marriage. The Catholic understanding of marriage, however, raises this to a new level. As the Catechism says: ‘The matrimonial covenant, by which a man and a woman establish between themselves a partnership of the whole of life, by its nature is ordered toward the good of the spouses and the procreation and education of offspring; this covenant between baptised persons has been raised by Christ the Lord to the dignity of a sacrament.’ (para.1601)
These rather abstract words are reflected however imperfectly in the experience of married couples. We know that at the heart of a good marriage is a relationship of astonishing power and richness, for the couple, their children, their wider circle of friends and relations and society. As a Sacrament, this is a place where divine grace flows. Indeed, marriage is a sharing in the mystery of God’s own life: the unending and perfect flow of love between Father, Son and Holy Spirit.
We know, too, that just as God’s love is creative, so too the love of husband and wife is creative of new life. It is open, in its essence, to welcoming new life, ready to love and nurture that life to its fullness, not only here on earth but also into eternity.
This is a high and noble vision, for marriage is a high and noble vocation. It is not easily followed. But we are sure that Christ is at the heart of marriage, for his presence is a sure gift of the God who is Love, who wants nothing more than for the love of husband and wife to find its fulfilment. So the daily effort that marriage requires, the many ways in which family living breaks and reshapes us, is a sharing in the mission of Christ, that of making visible in the world the creative and forgiving love of God.
In these ways we understand marriage to be a call to holiness for a husband and wife, with children recognised and loved as the gift of God, with fidelity and permanence as the boundaries which create its sacred space. Marriage is also a crucial witness in our society, contributing to its stability, its capacity for compassion and forgiveness and its future, in a way that no other institution can.
In putting before you these thoughts about why marriage is so important, we also want to recognise the experience of those who have suffered the pain of bereavement or relationship breakdown and their contribution to the Church and society. Many provide a remarkable example of courage and fidelity. Many strive to make the best out of difficult and complex situations. We hope that they are always welcomed and helped to feel valued members of our parish communities.
The reasons given by our government for wanting to change the definition of marriage are those of equality and discrimination. But our present law does not discriminate unjustly when it requires both a man and a woman for marriage. It simply recognises and protects the distinctive nature of marriage.
Changing the legal definition of marriage would be a profoundly radical step. Its consequences should be taken seriously now. The law helps to shape and form social and cultural values. A change in the law would gradually and inevitably transform society’s understanding of the purpose of marriage. It would reduce it just to the commitment of the two people involved. There would be no recognition of the complementarity of male and female or that marriage is intended for the procreation and education of children.
We have a duty to married people today, and to those who come after us, to do all we can to ensure that the true meaning of marriage is not lost for future generations.
With every blessing
Most Reverend V. Nichols, Most Reverend P. Smith
I feel that this letter was very well written. I believe it presents a very powerful and Biblical view of marriage that is definitely under attack everywhere. Rather than simply attacking gay marriage, they take the time to elaborate more on what God created marriage to be. In this description, not only is gay marriage shown to be wrong, but the beauty of God’s intent for marriage is affirmed. This is what married couples should aspire to become.
This issue is not about equality or discrimination, it’s about truth. I fear that too many Christians, especially in America, are buying into political correctness and distorted views of “love” and what it means to “love your neighbor”. As the church, I believe that we need to be much more firm and clear in what we are about with this issue. It’s time for us to not only proclaim God’s truth, but to live it. We can’t just protest gay marriage, we need to show the world what God intended marriage to be. As Pastor Peter has been talking about, we must be the example. When our marriages are healthy and God-honoring, that gives us the platform to speak against gay marriage. That gives us the vantage point to look at dying world and say, “We love you, but this is wrong.”
“A change in the law would gradually and inevitably transform society’s understanding of the purpose of marriage. It would reduce it just to the commitment of the two people involved.”
I would argue that society’s understanding of the purpose of marriage has already been transformed in this way, and that the law is just catching up to the reality of the (majority) culture. Sadly, the notion of marriage as a covenant and not just a contractual obligation-for-a-time, is largely lost in Western society.
I’m no longer sure that we should use the law to attempt to convince people to change their culturally-held view of marriage. Perhaps rather, we (as Christians who largely hold what the Priests/Bishops said in their letter to be true) ought to seek to change the culture–by living out the virtues of a life-long covenant in loving ways–and let the laws follow as they may.
I’m still in flux on this whole issue. So please treat my opinions gently…I might just change them!